


Restitution

by Alphalover



Category: Lois & Clark: The New Adventures of Superman
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-04
Updated: 2019-10-09
Packaged: 2020-11-23 19:03:01
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 9,989
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20894594
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alphalover/pseuds/Alphalover
Summary: Sequel to LST and SISLKal-El returns because asteroid





	1. Chapter 1

“Nightfall is coming,” Lex told her. “I... have protection, but not for everyone. I … of course mean to offer you protection.”

Lois nodded. Fortunately whatever dark paths he may have once taken – he seemed willing to play ‘nice’ now. Whatever disturbing interactions his doppelgängers had with hers, he never once approached her in a lustful sense.

“I … cannot – do that,” she said. “I’ll die free.”

“It would never be a prison. I would never be a jailer. I truly offer you a platonic situation. I hope you believe me.”

“I didn’t mean to offend you – I just can’t be caged. And a bunker would feel like a cage. I still feel like I’m suffering from lack of sun.”

“Fair enough,” he said. “Honestly - I don’t think I could stay hidden either. “

“So we call him.”

“You call him. It’s the best way. The world leaders don’t know he gave either of us communication devices , so we can do as we see fit.”

She nodded. 

“Do you think he would come?”

“If you asked for him, he would come.”

“I know. Zara would as well,” she mused. “I know that it’s survivable – but I feel guilty asking.”

“We ask for no more than two– we don’t want to tempt anyone with the return of their powers. Imagine having had them, and then losing them. I refuse to put our world at risk.”

She nodded. 

“Not to mention, trigger happy world leaders with red radiation. I don’t want to start a war, either. “

“Then it’s decided. We do this.”


	2. Chapter 2

Kal-El went about his days on the ship as privately and unobtrusively as he could, but he knew he failed. Everyone watched him. The women his clone had abused feared him, on a primitive level – even if nobody openly acted as if he made them uncomfortable.

Back on Earth, when he had revealed his existence, he had met with unrelenting terror from all but a few people – the world’s leaders, who would never show him fear, and of course – Lois and Lex.

He was still haunted by memories of encounters he had had.

_ Crashing, creaking metallic sounds. Move fast. People in danger. Cringing, terrified people – needing rescue, but not from him. I am not my clone. I won’t hurt you. No good. No good_. He had to force his aid on people trapped – not too many times, but enough that each encounter tormented him in memory. His clone loved inciting fear, and Kal-El abhorred it.

One time in particular, Lois had actually apologized to him – she witnessed his emotional aftermath – reading between his brittle mask of expressionlessness. _It isn’t you. It’s who you look like. It takes time. _As if Lois had ever owed him comfort.

He’d of course known that her reaction to the two Clarks had been filled with stark terror – but her words of comfort had done little to help him – even if it was proof that people could learn to deal with him. He hated hurting anyone with his presence. The Clarks felt that way too, but they didn’t have the actual guilt of failing an entire world. They accidentally looked like a tyrant... the tyrant was his own fault.

In the year he had been free, he couldn’t forget Earth. He couldn’t forget Lois. Her steely gaze that would soften sometimes when she felt sorry for him. He could have easily loved her. But that is why he had to stop thinking about her. He couldn’t ever actually hope to recreate the vast miracle that had been Clark and Lois – he could only ever stay as far from that place as possible – as far from Lois as possible, and never give her reason to fear again.

He sighed. He had to do something. He had to make himself useful . But how? Right now, he had no assigned duties, and he felt it. The respectful behavior of his people – still treating him as their leader – second only to Zara and Ching, made him uncomfortable. He did his own self-care, eschewing the aid of attendants.

_____

Kal-El shook with reaction. She had contacted him. Lois Lane had contacted him.

Another lonely bleak day of just existing, and he had returned to his room after offering his aid to Zara and Ching in the daily efforts of rebuilding a deeply damaged society. The pretendership had taken a huge toll on his people. To be part of something that they were helpless to stop had been deeply scarring to many. Nobody openly blamed him – it was enough he did it himself. He couldn’t even look Vina in the eye – he knew her thoughts – she had shared her memories. He knew what his clone had done, and had made her do.

The message was a recording – instant communication not possible based on how far apart they were. They needed help. They specifically wanted to keep the numbers down, and they wanted him to be one of ones who came to help. This request had to come from Lois , and possibly Lex – he couldn’t imagine the world’s leaders feeling secure enough with his own intentions to ask for him specifically. On the other hand, the two resistance leaders would have been loathe to trust anyone else. Lex probably had pushed for Zara – but Lois would have denied that.

Secrecy of course, at least in the beginning.

Resolutely he went to ask Zara and Ching for permission.

________

“I will go with you,” Zara said

“You are having a child,” Kal-El protested. “Would you risk your child’s life?”

“I would go in her stead,” Ching said.

“Lois asked for me, specifically,” Kal-El argued calmly. “If you are needed, I will let you know. Is this satisfactory?”

Zara and Ching exchanged glances and Zara nodded.

“You are permitted to go, Kal-El. They need you, and I know Lois will trust only a very few of us to help. You must seek out further help if you think you will need help.”

“I will. I do promise. Of course I will return. I do not belong on Earth.”


	3. Chapter 3

Her heart racing, Lois opted for solitude as she waited for Kal-El to arrive. He would arrive today, according to the recorded message he left for her on her Kryptonian communication device. He would come. And Ching was his backup – or partner – if needed – and Zara was pregnant.

She smiled sadly at that. Lex had been alarmed at the idea of more Kryptonians, but she’d told him that there was no way they could stop the other species from continuing their breeding without committing some form of genocide. They had to believe the more powerful species would respect their pledge never to harm the Earth again, because they really had no choice. The red radiation weapons would keep Earth safe, and that would have to be enough.

Lex had offered to be here with her, but she couldn't bear the thought of having him guess the tenor of her thoughts. If he suspected her ambivalence, he never said anything and for that she was grateful. Their rivalry had made way for friendship -one that she was only open to having after meeting the two Clarks. They had pulled her out of her bitter self, just by treating her … as a friend. Even before her captivity she didn't make friends easily. Especially with men. Men were rivals. Possible threats to her career path. And after Lord Kal-EL, men – Kryptonian men – were rapists.

With the asteroid on the way, things were uncertain all over again. She knew it was possible for a single Kryptonian to stop the asteroid and she was absolutely opposed to asking either Clark to do this. Not fair to force them into this encounter twice. She was selfish enough to risk Kal-El’s safety. They needed help. The asteroid would kill many people and change Earth’s climate in ways that would affect the remaining people’s quality of life. And she knew Kal-El could survive, and she trusted him more than his brethren. Of course she trusted Zara as well, but Zara was pregnant – and even if she weren’t, Lois would have felt worse about asking Zara. Was it because she felt the need to punish Kal-El? Or was it because she wanted to see him again.

That was the rub, wasn’t it. Lois was filled with nervous excitement at the prospect of seeing him again. The feeling currently playing fast and free with her stomach wasn’t dread.. it was – well yes, dread. She was afraid to see him again – but she was also excited in an anticipatory way.

How had that even happened? His name was Kal-El – same as her brutal assailant. And he looked exactly like him – except he didn’t. Feature for feature, the men were identical, but he looked more like the two Clarks than he did his clone. Facial expression, body language – these were all things that etched there way into who a person was. She had never seen the two men side by side, but if she had, she would have known which man was cruel, and which was kind.

Kal-El – and the two Clarks were actually men that would have appealed to her, had she not been through what she’d endured. They were handsome, strong and resolute. Honorable. Irresistible to anyone – and even if she mocked her doppelgängers for falling for aliens, in the end she understood. Their undeniable pull had made itself known to her – even if she was too broken to act on it.

But had the other Lois felt that way? Surely she had. She had been told some of the story of how they got together – near the end, after Lois had developed a sense of acceptance towards the two Clarks. The one who married her fellow victim was even more appealing than the other... he had adopted Lois as a sister despite all her efforts at ripping him to verbal shreds. In doing so, in always being there for her and never forcing anything on her, he had endeared himself to her and she actually missed him a lot.

She shook her head. Surely she wasn’t considering Kal-El as a romantic prospect? Why wasn’t that thought horrifying to her? Why, when she thought about it, did she feel a rush of warmth. Of happiness... of hope?

It had been a year since she’d last seen Kal-El – so perhaps she was really remembering Clark and Lois’s obvious love – and having false memories based on reflected glory. Once she saw Kal-El – would she feel sick? Would these strange thoughts be replaced by the much more logical fear and disgust? 


	4. Chapter 4

Lois was finally feeling the fear that she’d expected to feel earlier. He was here, and she had spoken to him. He would be in the bunker soon.

She paced nervously hoping that their encounter would not trigger any flashbacks. She was waiting for him – and that rang through with so many awful memories. Waiting for Kal-El. For Lord Kal-El, although he wasn’t lord anymore. Did that help? It did – a modicum, because it spoke further of the kind of person he was. Honorable.

But she still felt an urgent and terrifying need to hide. She could turn off her comm device – he would not be able to easily find her if she turned it off … but of course who could hide from a Kryptonian. He could easily find her. Her heartbeat. Nowhere was safe.

Dark thoughts crowded her. Would he wear his uniform? Black, and the blue crest of El ?

A knock on her door. Her heart felt like it was going to explode. But Kal-El – Lord clone Kal-El had never knocked. Ever. And she wasn’t in a bedroom. She wasn’t dressed in flimsy nothing. She wasn’t his slave.

She opened the door hereelf, bracing her for the sight of the Kryptonian.

And saw Clark, or what could have easily been Clark. A human looking Kal-El. Dressed in jeans. Dressed in a T-shirt. His gaze wary as hell, this had to be Kal-El.

“Lex left these for me... he told me where to find them. He did not wish for me to approach you in Kryptonian clothes and I agree.”

She nodded, still having trouble hearing his voice.

“Ah. Thank you – for coming – for helping us.”

“I could do no less.”

“How are Zara and Ching.” She asked as she stood aside to let him in. She shut the door, forcing herself to fake ease.

His gaze softened at the question.

“Happy. I think.”

“And welcoming a new child?”

He nodded.

“I am so glad for her - I honestly didn’t think it was possible.”

Kal flushed, knowing that Lois was aware of all Zara had suffered.

“I too am happy for her. She deserves happiness.”

He resisited the urge to tell her she did too.

“What about you?”

“I – am content enough,” he said carefully. “I no longer am the leader of my people.”

“I think you will always be that,” she said. “You gave your role up in order to protect them from what you thought was an ineffectual leader.”

“I was selfish. I did not wish to be a part of a society that forgot about me so easily,” he said, letting bitterness come out. “I do not in any way blame Zara or Ching, but I cannot get past it. Maybe in time. I have trouble accepting the council of elder’s apologies.”

“I understand. I can’t ever forgive them either. They could have put a stop to things and didn’t. Regardless of customs, allowing the suffering of others to continue because of political policies is unacceptable.”

“I totally agree,” he said. “Which is why I stepped back. I cannot pledge to follow a broken system.”

“What did you end up doing then?”

“I help Zara and Ching with making policy changes. I … keep to myself as much as possible otherwise.”

“You had years of isolation.”

“I was asleep.”

“Having horrific nightmares -”

“And you were living them. My life was easy in comparison.”

“So no woman in your life,” she finally asked, not knowing why she asked.

“My clone... filled my own people with terror. The women... I cannot – I cannot.”

“A lifetime of – nothing, ahead of you?”

“A lifetime of not hurting people.”

She felt a twinge of sorrow.

“I am very sorry to hear of the asteroid. I am gratified that you called me to help.”

“Well – it wasn’t an invitation to stay -” Her voice took on a strained note and his eyes grew shadowed. She felt ridiculous guilt for hurting him.

“I will leave when this is over. I just – wanted to help.”

She nodded, dropping her gaze, unwilling to see the hurt he could not hide.


	5. Chapter 5

It was several months before the asteroid would arrive. Kal-El had been the one to inform Lex about it, not wanting to alarm the world and not wanting the world to know that Kal-El was observing anything in regards to Earth. Although Lex had at one point seemed to dance along the line between honor and corruption, Kal-El had grown to trust that Lex would act in favor of his people. Much of that trust came from Lois’s own trust of the man.

The question regarding how to tell the world leaders that the asteroid was coming remained unanswered. Their fear of Kal-El might prevent them from acting in a way that would safeguard the planet, so Lex planned to have his best scientists work with Kal-El in order to lay out a plan of attack – when to try, what gear would be needed, flight plans for approaching, impact points for destructing, or anchor points and strategy for shoving out of the way, although the orbits would need to be calculated to ensure that it didn’t return on an impact path towards any of the solar system’s heavenly bodies.

Until that time, Kal-El would live in the bunker – the same one that had housed the resistance -it was a much cleaner and scientifically outfitted place -and Kal-El could hardly believe it was the same place that he’d spent so many despairing days.

He was glad to see Lois, but she was afraid of him, and thus, he wanted to give her the space she needed, but she too had taken up residence in the bunker, just like before.

“Kal-El,” Lex approached him, as he stood lost in thought. “Welcome to Earth...” His tone was ironic – the last time, the Kryptonians had been marauding invaders.

“I bid you greetings, Lex Luthor,” Kal-El said, relying on formality as a way to cover his nervousness.

“You look like the Clarks,” Lex laughed. “It’s incredible. “

Kal-El gave a small smile.

“I do not wish to remind people of Kryptonians. So if this helps, I am happy to dress this way.”

“It helps,” Lois said. “Thank you for that consideration.”

“It required no effort at all to conform to your wishes,” Kal-El told her soberly.

“Your people showed themselves to be arrogant and ‘above us’,” she argued. “That you aren’t proudly displaying your heritage and crest says that you are not that sort of person. It speaks well of you. You used to be the leader of your people.”

“You are most welcome,” he finally said, giving her the response she was seeking.

“Are you hungry, or are you interested in meeting with the team of scientists you'll be working with?”

“I am ready to meet with the scientists. Thank you.”

20 gazes remained fixed on him as he moved into the room.

The scientists had all been warned that Kal-El would be here – but seeing him walk through the door had the effect of raising heart and respiration rates. Fear would be inevitable until they learned to trust him. The women especially struggled to be calm. The ones chosen for this were at the top of their fields - but they also were picked from a set that excluded rape-victims from the invasion. Nonetheless, everyone knew about the sexual abuse perpetuated by the Kryptonians. By Kal-El’s clone.

“As you all know,” Lex took over the introductions, “This is Kal-El of Krypton, and he’s here to help us with the asteroid.” Lex had briefed his people a short time ago, not wanting panic to arise before the only chance of stopping the asteroid arrived. “Let me introduce you - “

“Not Lord Kal-El,” one scientist boldly asked, a middle-aged woman with an icy-grey gaze.

“No. I abdicated after we left. I could not lead my people after failing them so spectacularly.”

“Seems they failed you too.”

“They did. However, the original failure is mine. I failed to anticipate mutiny after I refused to consider settling my people on Earth.”

“Who did you leave in charge?”

“Zara and Ching.”

“Ching was a member of the warrior class.”

“Things are changing,” he said. “What happened helped wake us up to the idea that having right of ascension based solely on bloodline is a dangerous practice. “

“Interesting.”

“But not why we are here,” Lex put in. “Of course it will take you time and questions to get comfortable with our guest, but he is here to help.”

“And we can stop him if need be,” Another scientist spoke. “We have emitters all over the place, Kal-El, so we are prepared for treachery.”

Kal-El’s face darkened in regret that it was necessary. Lois watched him carefully and was gratified to see only regret and not anger at how he was being treated.

“I am relieved you have done so. I want to work with you to stop the asteroid, and I am not a threat to you. If the emitters remove fear, and allow us to work together in truth, then we have the highest chance of success.”

“Fear leads to the dark side,” Lois muttered, causing many in the room to nod approvingly at her.

Kal-El looked at her in confusion.

“I’m quoting an old earth philosopher,” she quipped.

“Dagoban, surely,” Lex answered.

“Fictional extra-terrestrial wisdom is still earth origin.”

  
“Kal-El, have you been apprised of the situation?”

Lex exhaled a breath he’d been holding as the questions began to flow, and Kal-El agreeably began to interact with the scientists. He was pleased that Martha had been the one to ask the first questions. She was the counterpart to the mother of both Clark Kents, but Kal-El had never encountered her – and she had never met the two Clarks. He’d included her in this not only due to her sharp mind and advanced degrees in the needed subjects, he also wanted to make use of the alleged soul-connections that wells seemed to believe existed.

The day passed with reasonable ease – all things considered. People were wary, and women suspicious, but Kal-El himself acted the way the two Clarks had around the humans in this world... they hadn’t taken any offense at others’ fears, and they had given people the space they all needed.

The scientists grew tired, and thus – it was agreed that they would meet again in 8 hours – the scientists were sworn to secrecy, but they would leave here and go home, while Lex, Kal-El and Lois would remain.

“Martha,” Lex asked. “I’m curious about your thoughts on our guest,” Lex had requested a private meeting with the scientist.

“He seems to want to help,” she said briskly. “And he’s the one thing standing between us and destruction, ironically enough. I wish it didn’t have to be this way, but as it does, I have to say that he’s easier to work with than I had expected. His lack of arrogance is surprising.”

Lex wished he could tell her about the Clarks, but she would think he was crazy, and knowledge of the multiverse was best kept quiet. He also never wanted the Kryptonians to think that their Kal-El was a fake, brought forth from another world – who knows what they would do in that case? Would they come back to attack Earth?

“I trust that his intentions are honorable,” Lex answered. “But I agree, it’s difficult working with a Kryptonian.”

“I guess easier for me. I was never targeted by the slavers,” she laughed. “Too old to work, and... not interesting to them as a sex slave.”

A harsh indrawn breath stopped her sarcasm as she realized that Lois had just entered the room, having also been asked to join in this discusison. “Sorry Lois, didn’t see you there,” Martha said in her typical laconic way.

“My fault for not announcing myself,” Lois said. “Years of living in hiding... I move quietly.”

“How are you doing with kal-El being here?”

“I don’t believe that he’s a threat,” she answered. “I guess it’ll be difficult, but I prefer this to the asteroid hitting us.”

__

“How was it for you,” Lex asked Kal-El later.

  
“Difficult, but better than I had expected.”


	6. Chapter 6

It was disheartening to be back on a world where he wore the skin of a conqueror.   
  
Mostly his fellow Kryptonians understood he wasn’t his clone, and his withdrawal from his role and refusal to ever engage the services of a concubine made his people view him as a noble soul who had suffered greatly. Even his clone’s victims saw him in a positive light, but Kal-El did his best to avoid anyone who had suffered at his clone’s hands. He felt no need to make things worse – for either those victims or himself. He was content to live apart.  
  
Here on Earth, he could have no such peace. He had incredibly destructive abilities, which, when coupled with the fact that he was identical to the world’s lead tormentor, meant that very few humans could interact with him without feeling absolute terror.

The scientists had started out on edge, stiff around him afraid to treat him as an equal partner in the venture to stop NightFall. But Kal-El had been humble and amiable, accepting their fear and anger, and as such, by the end of the day, people were a little more comfortable around him. The absolute terror that his approach engendered seem to decrease.

Everyone had gone to their homes for the night, leaving Kal-El, Lex and Lois the sole occupants of the bunker. Lex had food delivered, and had requested that Kal-El join them for meals. Kal-El felt strange doing so, but he knew that it was important for everyone that he not live in isolation – the more they saw of him, the more they spoke with him, the easier they would feel about his presence on earth. Truth be told, he wanted to spend time with Lois – he had missed her. He knew now that they did have a connection, and even if it could never be realized, spending even a little time with her today had felt right – if not tinged with remorse for all his clone had done to her.

“We thought you were going to stand us up,” Lex greeted him jovially as Kal-El entered the dining area. The bunker had been returned to it’s former glory – it was well furnished and luxurious. A fitting home for a wealthy man should the unthinkable happen. The dining area was welcoming and warm – and the food was already presented by attendants who had left once their task was done

“I would not do that, “ he said seriously. “You asked me to attend meals, and that I will do.”

“Is it what you want,” Lois asked him curiously, forcing herself to act normal around him. Dressed so human, he reminded her of Clark. And she missed Clark... at least the one that she had really gotten to know.

“I … am glad for the company,” he said gently.

“You lead a lonely life, “ Lois asked him, there were no barriers of polite discourse left.

“I … do not feel comfortable spending time with - the others- I feel as though I no longer really belong to that society.” His eyes grew bleak. Sometimes he wished that he had died with Krypton.

“You must feel betrayed,” Lex offered forth.

“I have mixed feelings,” he admitted. “Thus my - self imposed isolation.”

“Do you see Zara and Ching at all?”

“I do. I consider them family,” he added. “Zara and I have become friends. I think she felt guilty for not … knowing. Our friendship has helped us move past our feelings of mutual guilt.”

Lois watched him – it was obvious he was lonely. The idea left her feeling crushed somehow. If they were soulmates, she understood that this melancholy would be the result of knowing that their connection could never be fulfilled. She knew she could never be with any man, let alone a Kryptonian – let alone, Kal-El, not after what she’d been through – but still – there was a part of her that knew that the connection was there.

“Speaking of isolation, it’s just us three,” Lex said. “We are being careful to safeguard the knowledge of your presence.”

“And before you ask, I’m fine with that,” Lois said. “Lex and I are here willingly. We can leave whenever we choose, so don’t feel as though we are in prison. You on the other hand are – and for that, I’m sorry.”

“I came to Earth to help stop Nightfall. The sun lamps you provided are a good substitute for the sun.”

Lois felt a quiver of unease. That’s right. He probably was fully powered even though she had yet to see him do anything.

Kal-El caught the motion and looked briefly at her. No need to pretend like those feelings weren’t there.

“If you wish to arm yourselves with radiation emitters,” he said genty, noting that there were both unarmed, “I would understand.”

“You know this entire facility is set up so that we could take down any Kryptonian with minimal effort.”

“You must also know that I could probably remove most emitters without being seen,” he responded. “I think you know this. Therefore, I appreciate that you have some amount of faith that I won’t do it.”

“Well, to be honest, Kal-El, I don’t trust anyone,” Lex said. “So you’d be surprised... on the other hand, I actually do think you are here to help. And I have no ill intentions towards either of you, despite my doppelgangers. I have done terrible things to get to where I am – but the invasion did change me. And I guess you have to hopefully trust me on that.”

Lois, who’s heart had squeezed in her chest upon hearing Kal-El’s easily stated dismissal of the effect of emitters was still trying to regain her voice.


	7. Chapter 7

The sharp rap of a door closing heralded Lex’s departure from the room, accompanied by his quietly spoken words regarding some phone calls he needed to make.

Ever since Clark had come to this world and gently and affably charmed his way around her hostility, Lois was hard pressed to see the enemy in the face of Kal-El. She was grateful now for what she once saw as a weakness – both in her doppelgängers and now herself as she faced him. She had to ask him a hard question, and she had to believe herself safe from harm.

“You know, The Clarks strongly disliked Lex and it was mutual. Often times they would get into verbal baiting wars... and I think that Lex enjoyed it. He knew that they had run afoul of his doppelgänger and he enjoyed having powerful men treat him with caution.”

“His doppelgängers tried to kill them.”

“And nearly succeeded. And from what I learned, it was because Lex couldn’t bear to have anyone more powerful than he was in his realm.”

Kal-El nodded, waiting for her question.

“Did you deliberately bait Lex just now? Do you think he was baiting you?”

Kal-El exhaled as he pondered her question.

“I did not bait you,” he said. “That impulse is never there, however Lex... I may indeed have wanted to - “

“Frighten him?”

“Never,” his answer was so sudden, that she believed it.

“But you also wanted him to know that you could – if you wanted – be unstoppable.”

“When he said what he did – I guess I did feel – a need to compete with him."

“Because both of you were kings. His kingship more metaphorical than yours.”

He flushed, and looked down, which heartened her greatly.

“You think I was establishing a position of dominance out of habit?”

“Do you?”

“Likely I was - but not because of my abilities,” he finally answered her after a long silence.

“Lex will never cede the battlefield.”

“I do not intend to engage in battle with anyone.”

“Everyone here is afraid of you, and most people will not challenge you unless you are disabled by radiation. Lex is the only person I know who would. He wouldn’t even care if it led to his death. That being said – you have to learn not to let him get under your skin.”

Kal-El nodded, his eyes on hers radiating shame.

“If you feel like you need to warn us that you can disable our only means of defense because your honor compels you to do so, then fine – it might be hard to hear, but I understand that honor will naturally be difficult to stifle and I actually do believe you have a great deal of honor – I just want you to be aware that from my perspective, you reminded me of - “

He inhaled sharply at her words, showing the emotional pain that he clearly fought to hold at bay.

“No, not him - you reminded me of the two clarks – when they would argue with Lex, and I think you maybe are more like them than you know. Like Lex, loathe to cede. But you have to, because you aren’t on equal playing ground here. People know what you can do, and that includes Lex. Even if he shows no fear, he must feel it... and for that sake alone, please – try to remember – we are very uneasy about having you here.”

He nodded, his throat suddenly tight.

“I am sorry – because I cannot tell you in all truth that I said what I did in order to be helpful. I suppose – when he said what he did- I did feel the need to assert that I would not be so easily brought down, and I do think that I am – in some way, standing up for the others. Lex is not his doppelgängers And I do not have an adversarial relationship with him. I will do better.”

“You saw your clone, right? You saw him – when you challenged his right?”

“Yes, I did.”

“Remember how terrifying he was?” She was very emotional now, her eyes liquid brown and her mouth quirked in pain.

“Yes. I do.”

“So – I’m sorry to say this – because you came all this way to help us – but Kal-El – that’s how we feel when we look at you – we can’t help it – and we do get used to you as a separate person over time, but then each time we see you again, it’s like that – like seeing him, all over again. You have to get this right... even if you’re here to help – you have to get it right. Please.”

He shuddered, hearing her say a word that at one point he would have sworn would never pass from her to him.

“No need to ask, Lois – I should have known. I should have done better. I may find Lex a challenge on occasion, however - I have to remember that I have both a history here, and terrifying abilities that force me to edit my response."

“You’re suffering from what was done, and you must also be dealing with intense emotional fallout. Please don’t tell me you deserve it – just be honest.. what do you feel?”

“I - I am angry – not at you, but at my people – for what they did – and for not knowing it wasn’t me. Yes – I am angry – I feel betrayed and resentful. This is why I refused to be the leader – after what they did – I … I could never deal fairly with anyone.”

She smiled sadly and shook her head.

“I actually think you would have – but you deserve to free yourself of that burden. You deserve more than what life is going to give you... and what you are dealing with here. Maybe – in time, people will be easier around you. I was – with the Clarks and then with you.. just give us time.”

He nodded solemnly.

  



	8. Chapter 8

"So I didn’t chase you away,” Lois told Kal-El the next morning when he joined her for breakfast. Lex had yet to arrive, and Kal-El had debated entering the room when he realized Lois was the only one there. He'd gone ahead in, not wanting her to feel uncomfortable by his absence.

He could pretend to not understand, he could hide behind his still formal ‘Royal airs’, as the two Clarks had frequently commented on. But that wouldn’t help matters, and he knew he had to show courage and allow his true self to show.

He flashed her a quick and friendly smile – one that brought to mind both Clarks.

“I am aware that you and Lex want me here at meals, and if I stay away, you may conclude that I do not care what you want. I do not wish for you to worry about my intentions – if I keep to myself, it will be harder for you to continue to believe that I am here to help.”

Lois regarded him in surprise. She had half expected him to give her a frustrating non-response, along the lines of “I promised to do my duty”, and she wasn’t in the mood to hear it today.

She gave him a small smile, and Lex, walking in, held up a glass of orange juice to toast them both.

“Well look at this. Equanimity.”

Kal-El felt … lighter… as he moved to join the scientists. He would always be on guard around humans, worrying that he might be projecting some kind of menace when none was intended, but he tried harder to channel the Clarks.

He wasn’t an earth-raised Kryptonian – pretending to be someone he wasn’t would not bring him any measure of peace – but he’d seen how the two doppelgangers had interacted with Lois, and the other Lois who had been enslaved, and he felt he could emulate that without seeming as if he was trying too hard.

Yesterday, he had stayed apart from the scientists, but this day he forced himself to be proactive with questions. One woman was celebrating a birthday, and Kal-El approached her and offered forth his congratulations on the day – after of course, her colleagues had all sung to her a traditional song.

She was bemused, but not overtly terrified by his singling her out. Lex had only called forth scientists who could work with Kal-El . Success meant not letting fear get in the way of science.

“Thank you,” she said, giving him a welcoming smile. “Do you celebrate birthday anniversaries in your culture?”

“Only certain ages,” he answered, trying to reward her bravery with some of his own. He felt very awkward talking about his people with someone who had been brutalized by his people.

“So not every anniversary, but those deemed important?”

“Yes.” He didn’t bother telling her that the royal customs were different from the non-royals – the last thing he needed to remind her was he’d once been ‘Lord Kal-El – ruler of new krypton.’

“What was the last one you celebrated.?"

This last question came from a man who had approached them, eager to join in the growing camaraderie. All the scientists knew that Kal-El would be easier to work with, and more likely to remain ‘friendly’, if he felt part of the team. They all understood the importance of creating a friendly and collaborative environment, but none had any idea how to put aside their own fears and let it happen. That Kal-El was reaching out was heartening.

“My coming of age,” he told them, his gaze dropping, recalling that event was the one that had led to the invasion, which had decimated earth.

“What does that mean to you,” Martha Kent asked, joining the group. Kal-El was fascinated by her – knowing her to be Clark’s mother – but he didn’t want her to know their connection – at least, not from him.

“It means I left behind being a youth, and took on the role I was born to do.”

“Leader of your people,” she nodded. “Right?”

He nodded. “I … was – disabled soon after. To me, my coming of age was very recent, regardless of how long ago it really was.”

“The years you spent in stasis – created a time jump in your mind,” Martha persisted.

“Yes.” Kal-El wished to end this conversation. He never spoke of his days in stasis and he still felt terror and helplessness when he allowed his thoughts to reflect on those terrible years.

“You were disabled because you refused to allow your people to settle on earth?”

“Yes. Although my refusal only made things worse for Earth.”

“Not to mention worse for you,” a man named Dr. Klein retorted. “Perhaps we would have been better off with a friendlier conqueror.”

Kal-El flushed in embarrassment.

“I cannot imagine how we could have peacefully co-existed. The abilities granted to us by your sun would have been difficult to resist – some of us could do it, but not all of us.”

“How are you so sure you can do it?”

“I left radiation emitters behind so that you could protect yourselves from an invasion from my people. If you wanted to kill me now, you could.”

“We haven’t exactly tested that, though," Dr Klein said, his voice edged with anger. "It's only your word, and a Kryptonian's word..."

“I … will not defend myself if you chose to do so.”

“We will die without your help,” Martha chimed in. “So we’re better off believing you mean what you say. I see no point in trying to hurt you in order to prove a point.”


	9. Chapter 9

Bernie's words rent the fragile camaraderie, leaving in its place heavy awkward tension.

Of course, nobody could forget the clone nor the invasion, but Kal-El did not exude menace or even a sense of superiority. He was collaborative and amiable, and was working with them to save their world. His effort at trying to socially integrate had lowered many people's guards.

Martha waited a moment, and then called everyone to order.

“Let's start...” She began to set the agenda for the day. There was much to be done before Zero-Day, and Martha had been assigned team leader — not just for her knowledge — but also her strong leadership skills.

One of aerospace engineers began to speak for her group.

“We are going to run simulations — knowing Nightfall's position and trajectories, we need to start narrowing down on ideal departure time, so we can determine and prioritize Kai-El's best approach-routes.”

“Then there's the question of your physical limitations,” Bernie joined in, addressing Kai-El directly, his eyes slightly apologetic at how he's been acting. “There's a long list of questions and experimentation protocols that we have to resolve before Zero-Day.”

“Both his presence and Nightfall are currently state secrets? How will we run these tests,” Lois asked? She'd been present for all of the morning's events, but had remained silent through much of it — she didn't want to taint any interactions with her own past. As the leader of the resistance, she had to step down and let Martha take over — this was no longer about ridding the earth of invaders.

“We can run some of them in lab, but if we have to know what Kal-El can handle or even do, we have to test outside. The secret of his presence on earth will be disclosed, and then we'll have to go public with Nightfall.”

“Well, we can't risk the world for the sake of keeping people ignorant,” Bernie argued. “They will have to learn to deal."

"You had troubles and you were vetted before joining the team for biases towards xenophobia. I have personal experience with the situation, Bernie - anyone who endured what I did, and who is still alive, will panic. For his sake, and our own, we have to keep this a secret."

“None of it matters if we all die from Nightfall.”

“Kal-El, Can you speak with other Kryptonians and find out what they know regarding their own physical limitations on earth? You were in stasis for so long, and then you stayed hidden and out of the way. You didn't exercise your own abilities unless forced by circumstance.”

Kal-El regarded Lois with hidden admiration. She was putting aside her own fears and challenges to have this difficult conversation with him. This had to be triggering dark memories and thoughts.

He nodded.

“I will." It might take some time to get answers — if you are willing to give me list of questions, I will ask. The more people who can answer, the more likely we are to approximate facts.”

“That's great,” Bernie told him. “And we appreciate it, but you have to actually be measured to know for sure. We can't rely on faulty memories.”

“Agreed,” Martha retorted. “But there are some questions that we need answers to that are difficult to test in secret and the exact numbers aren't mission critical. Saving earth is our top concern… but we know that we have to be careful right now with how much we share. Mass panic will hinder us as much as anything.”

“This is frustrating,” one of the others said. “Welcome to Earth, thanks for trying to stop a deadly asteroid from killing us all– now hide, so we don't try to kill you.”

Kal-El turned in surprise to the speaker. Awkward at her attempt at being friendly, he began to answer.

"Considering... "

"With all due respect," Martha said, "Let's please stay on track. This line of talking can wait until lunch or dinner -or whatever you all want to do tonight... yourself included," she told Kal-El firmly.

He paused and then nodded, his gaze friendly and appreciative that she was treating him like he wasn't dangerous. The others around felt varying degrees of surprise and admiration that Martha was willing to be forceful with him, but as he didn't seem to mind, it further cemented the fact that he could be trusted.


	10. Chapter 10

Bernie was a fair and decent person and he knew that he had been rude towards a man who's only actual crime was in having been victimized by his own trusted subordinates. It wasn't even reasonable to think that Kal-El should have seen his own attack coming, so why should Bernie lay the guilt of all that his clone had done at his feet? Add to the fact that Kal-El accepted Bernie's anger made it worse. If he would at least defend himself as a blameless party, Bernie could continue to hold onto his anger. If Bernie couldn't hold onto his anger, or even justify it, then he needed to apologize to Kal-El. Difficult to do, because it was hard to talk directly to Kal-El without feeling menaced - it was lizard-brain reaction and lizard-brain reactions tended to keep humans alive.

Martha had pulled him aside after the opening agenda to speak privately.

_He has to trust us, Bernie – he is relying on us to safely see him through his ultimate goal – destroying an asteroid that threatens life on Earth. He needs to trust that we care about seeing him to safety after the threat to our world is gone. He knows this, but I haven't heard him express any fears about his own well-being. I'd wager he won't ever question whether or not we care about whether he lives or dies – he probably thinks he deserves to die for how he thinks he failed two worlds_.

Of course, Martha had been correct in her admonishing, but it was still difficult for Bernie to forgive — because women he had loved — as friends, as sisters, as even potential hoped for more — many had been lost to the invasion — and while many had survived, they were shells of their former selves.

Kal-El was talking to a group of scientists — and while Bernie was sure they were underneath it all afraid in a visceral sense, because of course — the Kryptonian did look exactly like his clone, regardless that his his body language was welcoming and non-threatening, they were overcoming those fears to get their work done.

Bernie waited for his moment and then approached his quarry.

“Kal-El, do you have time to talk with me,” he asked , forcing himself to act normal and unafraid.

“At your convenience,” Kal-El responded with absolute politeness – it was unnerving this politeness, in stark contrast from the contemptuous cruelty his clone and ilk had displayed.

“Alone, if you please?”

An odd expression shuttered through Kal-El's gaze — one of confusion, and even… was that wistfulness? The vulnerability haunted Bernie – suddenly he realized how young Kal-El really was. Young enough to be Bernie's son.

“Of course — if you lead the way?”

Bernie stifled a chuckle at how Kal-El was continuing to efface himself — allowing others to walk in front — a position of power — and then suggesting that Bernie choose the venue — phrasing it as a question. Something else Martha said hit him full force._His own people would also treat him as if walking on egg shells after what they collectively endured at his clone's hands. Imagine that. He had political power over them, and they feared him because of his clone — because of things someone who looked like him did. He's born to lead — and yet he has to be cautious in how he expresses himself — he can never act on his childhood training — he had to reinvent himself to be acceptable to those who were reminded of a monster._

  
Bernie closed the door, wanting to make up for his outburst by showing some level of trust. He briefly realized that Kal-El might not feel safe — but then dismissed that as laughable. If Bernie wanted to use red-radiation, Kal-El could stop him from afar.

“I was rude to you , and I apologize.”

Kal-El looked a way for a moment, and then returned Bernie's gaze.

“I met my clone,” he said quietly. “ I understand.”

The stark truth in the Kryptonian's voice froze Bernie for a moment.

“You met him?”

“I had to prove that I was the real me in order to end the invasion. I walked into a room where he and other council members were meeting. I saw him and was on the receiving end of his hatred and anger – at least – emotionally. We used radiation emitters to disable everyone – including myself. Nonetheless, that moment was enough. I understand why you see him in me, and why that makes it difficult to trust that I do not mean any harm.”

“That's… awfully honest of you,” Bernie answered, feeling more of his fear slip away. As he spoke to Kal-El – his resemblence to the clone diminished. More than genetics made for a face – the remorse, the anguish – these transformed Kal-El's face into one that had suffered. A kindred sprit.

“It is the truth,” Kal-El sighed. “I saw him, he made me feel threatened… and knowing how many people had to interact with the monster wearing my face… my name… well, I understand how I will always be that monster – regardless of my good intentions.”

“Well… I don't see that monster now", Bernie said, reaching out a hand to shake Kal-El's.

Kal-El hesitated only briefly before he reached out to complete the handshake. He smiled – a hesitant and vulnerable expression, endearing himself further to the older scientist.

“I'll stay for dinner if you join in,” Bernie said. “If that would be acceptable to you.”

The hesitant smile grew to be less hesitant.

“I would like that.”


	11. Chapter 11

“Is this what you expected,” Lex asked Kal-El after they both arrived well after the party was underway.

He shook is head, amazed by the intense revelry.

“After the invasion,” Lois said, coming in right after them, “when people party, they no longer hold back. We – all of us – never thought we'd be anything other than slaves… or rats, underground.” Her voice was dark and bitter as she spoke these words. She hadn't wanted to be difficult with Kal-El who had, thus far, shown an incredible amount of strength in his willingness to endure human rage – she just couldn't hold back sometimes and she knew he didn't want that from her anyways. 

“Celebrations are important,” Kal-El agreed quietly. “Especially after what you all suffered.”

“Did your people celebrate the overthrowing of the false government.”

“Not like this. “

“Too wild? Too primitive?” Lois's voice held a bit of an edge still

He regarded her carefully.

“No. I did not mean that. We don't celebrate like this now, but we did in the past- and not because it was primitive behavior — we were a different people before we knew we were doomed.”

“That's… interesting.”

“Before we knew our world was doomed, we were careless with it's resources. Our society wasn't based on inherited titles either. “

“Why did you revert to inherited titles,” asked Lex.

Kal-El flushed. 

“Long before Krypton actually died, the scientific community had predicted it – not really when… but that it would happen and it would happen probably within a 1-2 centuries. They collectively began to make plans for our species survival -including changing our society from a more egalitarian one – to the one you now see. Women lost their political power - because … “ he paused seeing that Lois had grown pale.

“You needed them as brood mares,” she said. “So take away their right to say no?”

“And take away a man's right to fight for a woman's right to say no,” Lex added. “To the king, the riches go.”

“Yes, “ Kal-El looked uncomfortable. “That is indeed what happened. “

“So if a Kryptonian from 300 years ago came to earth during the invasion, they would have no problem ousting your clone from power because they wouldn't have seen him as having power over their own choices.”

“Yes.”

“Well.That really sucks,” Lois said. Lex winced at her terminology and she glared at him. He shrugged at her.

“To be fair – our own people have gone through that kind of societal structure more than once in recorded history – in fact, it goes on even now-or did-before the invasion.”

“The need to increase numbers and spread one's DNA does make people act like monsters at times,” Lois agreed. “It's just strange to think of your people as having a different structure – they were so completely devoted the idea of inherited leader that they allowed atrocities to happen. That's some hellish brainwashing.”

“Yes,” Kal-El agreed. “It is. And I hope it will change. Zara is a strong leader who has no tolerance at all for the abuse of women.”

Lois flushed and regarded him cooly. “Of course. She wouldn't.”

“As the head of your society, she can decree changes – but it will take a long time for people to actually change their ways. “ Lex added carefully. “I'm sure the abuses continue.”

“At least she's taking the first steps,” argued Lois. 

“Her own experience taught her she would never wish to see anyone else forced to live like that.”

“How did we get on this particular topic,” Lex asked after an awkward break in the conversation.

“I began to talk about my people's older customs and -”

“I meant that rhetorically. Look, let's join the party – they've been watching us talk but are afraid to interrupt.”

“Afraid… “

“Social fear. Not physical.”

“Are you three planning on going in, or are you going to stand near the entrance,” Martha laughed as she and Bernie both came in together.


	12. Chapter 12

“Shots,” the very drunk birthday celebrant demanded the approaching group. She was drunk enough not to react to Kal-El's approach fearfully. Lois noted that Kal-El on his part was emitting body language that marked him nonthreatening.

“Why not,” Martha laughed, grabbing one for herself. Bernie shook his head. “Whiskey makes me sick.”

“Easy on those, Martha. Will we have to call Jonathan to come get you,” laughed another reveler.

“I can handle myself just fine,” Martha said calmly. “Home is walking distance after all, Thanks to Lex's generosity in giving us all homes, after the world's rebirth.”

"Not to worry. My drivers will take everyone home,” Lex said. “We can't risk the loss of our most brilliant minds to drunken accidents.”

“Shot, Lex,” Lois handed him one, taking one herself.

“Really?” His expression showed his old hauteur at the idea.

“Did you ever do shots?”

“No. Constant control was my mantra,” he admitted. “The better to win everything.”

She laughed mirthlessly. “Funny how life ends up taking in such different paths than the ones we envisioned. Your games of manipulation are no longer of import.”

“I no longer value living at the top of the world,” he said. “Losing the world… it – altered me, speaking of altered societies," he shot Kal-El a look as he said it, referring to the earlier talk on Kryptonian society.

“Slainte,” she toasted, gently tapping her shot glass of whiskey against his, and she tipped it down her throat. Her gaze was a challenge for him to join the masses. She didn't offer one to Kal-El, because the idea felt too intrusive.

“You wound me,” he answered, following her action. “This is hardly single malt.” Throwing it back, he made a face that provoked an answering half grin.

“It does the trick.”

“Which is….”

"A momentary lapse of ... pain."

Martha patted her gently on the arm.

“I know. Sometimes… you can convince yourself that we are still living in the not too distant past – before our world was overrun.”

“Except of course we have a Kryptonian here,” laughed one of the drunk partiers - “Ah – no offense, of course. You obviously aren't an invader.”

Kal-El listened to the conversations and tried not to act in any way that would be perceived as threatening. This last statement didn't offend him – merely increased the feeling his being here was not really a good idea - yet, ignoring the invitation would have alarmed them all. So here he was.

“Hey! None of that. It's my birthday and I want everyone to get along. “

“Just how old are you today?” Another shouted.

“You aren't supposed to ask me that -tell him Martha.”

Martha laughed and refused to be drawn in.

“Don't you think they will be too drunk to work tomorrow,” Bernie asked feeling nervous about how rowdy his peers were becoming.

  
“I doubt it,” Martha soothed him. “We need this. We need it more than… “ she broke off. “We are a broken people… so … we need to find our way back to being healed. If this kind of thing gives people a momentary cessation of the constant struggle and misery we face on a daily basis, It can only be a good thing.”

“Martha, you mentioned someone named Jonathan,” Kal-El awkwardly broke the silence that followed her statement. “You are married to him?”

It was a bold question, but after hearing his name mentioned, Kal-El couldn't help but be curious about the man who in other worlds was his father. So far, Martha hadn't treated him with fear, so he hoped his question wouldn't trigger her negatively.

She nodded, her expression growing bleak. Kal-El regretted his curiosity.  
  
“And he knows about my work here. He knows about your presence. He won't tell anyone,” she growled at Lex who shook his head disapprovingly.

“On your head be it, if he does,” Lex grumbled.

“On my planet, “ she laughed. “I know the stakes.”

“You will die, if others know I'm here,” Kal-El said, horrified. Lex sounded as if he was already passing down a death sentence.

“What Lex said… was … hyperbole, but there are factions who might ...consider us collaborators.”

“We know this, and we aren't afraid,” one of the drunk scientists chimed in.

“Some of us are,” said another.

“Okay but – i'd rather be thought a collaborator than endure an asteroid impact that could wipe us out with a dust cloud.”

“I'd rather not die from the asteroid, nor be taken prisoner by crazed zealots.”

“We do what we must,” Lois chimed in, grabbing another shot. “But we are all smart enough to know how to keep our secrets.”

“You've had plenty of experience keeping under the radar,” one of the revelers praised her thoughtlessly “We all thought you were dead. The leader of the invasion thought you were dead. You hid from a telepathic super-powered being for years.”

“This is different,” she said shortly, forcing herself to control her tremors his words provoked. “In those days, I stayed in a lead-lined underground bunker. Now, I go out in the world freely. It requires a different kind of rigor to keep the zealots from becoming suspicious.”

“Let's...discuss that later,” said Martha, seeing Lois's reaction. “Jonathan is my husband, and he can be trusted. But… he was injured badly for defiance. He… doesn't go out much .”

“Burns,” said Lois softly. “His arm and leg were burned as punishment for his verbal defiances.”

Kal-El winced at her words.

“He stood up to Nor,” said Martha proudly, remembering that horrific day. “They still... took.. the women he was protecting … but Jonathan… he never stopped trying to get them back - despite his injuries.”

“You know, you just have to say the word, and prosthetics of the finest order will be fashioned for him,” Lex told her seriously.

She nodded. “He knows. Maybe after the asteroid is taken care of. We can all move on.”

She looked at Kal-El ruefully.

“I guess you wish you hadn't asked.”

He looked pale and stricken.

“I… am honored to hear of of your heroic husband,” he told her solemnly, thinking how his doppelgängers would have felt knowing what happened to their father's alternate.


End file.
